Pregnancy is weird. It’s fun. It’s fun to feel kicks and hiccups, take pictures, and look at cute tiny outfits. It’s terrifying. It’s terrifying to realize you haven’t felt any kicks in a while, imagine traumatizing birth scenarios, and realizing how much of what’s ahead is completely unknown. It’s also exhausting, and exciting, and annoying, and a complete and total rollercoaster of craziness with, like, four loop-de-loops. I’m grateful for this baby and this pregnancy, especially after our losses, but reality is hitting me hard. I’m going to be a mom.
Fortunately, we have amazing family and friends that are blessing the everliving poop out of us. I cannot express how much I appreciate (and need) all the tips and advice I’m getting from fellow moms. I also can’t thank people enough for giving us essential items and gifts. If anything, being pregnant helps me to count my blessings, and, well, there’s too many to count!
For those of you that I don’t get to talk to every day (because school, and work, and life keeps me busy, and your life surely keeps you equally busy), I wanted to write up a little update about this rollercoaster of craziness.
Lemme start out with this: I am Type 1 Diabetic in a full remission. It’s kind of unbelievable, and I get a lot of rolling eyes from nurses when I try to explain this, but it’s true! I was diagnosed at 13-years-old and depended completely on insulin (at LEAST five injections a day) for five years, but my blood sugar began to normalize at around 18. My dad lost his job that same year, and no longer needing insulin combined with a loss of insurance led me to kind of just stop worrying about the whole thing. I continued to get an A1C test every year (a test to see your average blood glucose levels), and they always came back within non-diabetic range. It’s worth noting that I have a persistent anti-GAD antibody that means I am Type 1 diabetic as opposed to a misdiagnosed Type 2 or other possibilities. Fast forward to now, and my diabetes seems to manifest itself while I’m pregnant. Because of my history, my doctors and I kept a close eye on it from the minute I got the second line on the pee stick. That’s the good news. The “bad” news is that being pregnant and diabetic is really hard and scary.
I didn’t realize until a few weeks ago just how dangerous high glucose levels can be for an unborn baby. Possible consequences for this include: big huge babies, possible birth defects, placental abruption, a still born, and more. I feel bad for not realizing all of this months ago, and I’m terrified now to know it at all. Unlike gestational diabetes, everything is a little amplified in established diabetics (like myself). I’ve done a pretty dang good job at keeping my sugars in check, but because I have to use the aid of medication AND adjust said medication often, I qualify as a “poorly controlled” diabetic in the world of pregnancy and birth. As a “poorly controlled” diabetic, it’s super unsafe to let me go to full-term. My doctor will induce between 37 and 39 weeks. This is up to his discretion and is mostly reliant on my glucose levels.
I’m a little nervous about being induced. Heck, I’m nervous about birth in general. Although it’s kind of nice knowing a narrowed range for our little baby boy to come, and he’s coming whether I’m ready or not. So, I better attempt to get ready somewhat?
Also, shout out to Taylor. He is constantly saying the same things over and over again to calm my nerves and make me feel better. He’s a strong steady support that is an A++++ in the husband-of-a-pregnant-lady game.